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Drink beer. Touch beards.

I am byesexual as in I’m not interested goodbye

(Source: sadillite, via degreeschelsius)


if a woman’s hand is steady enough to put on winged eyeliner then it’s steady enough to stab you in the heart 

(via ishouldbedoingothershit)


Why Did I Do That?: A novel by me, with special guest appearances by several alcoholic beverages

(Source: homovikings, via simplyaddsparkle)


no one understands my love for Wednesday Addams

(via wakeupdanii)


my coworker just told me about a kid he knew in second grade that was really allergic to peanuts but one day during lunch he said that he couldn’t take it anymore and wanted to know what reeses taste like so he pulled out his epipen, ate the reese cup then stabbed himself with the epipen and told the teacher to call the hospital and that kid is the most hardcore kid I’ve ever heard of I wanna be his friend 

(via wakeupdanii)